Anger continues to be a major concern I see in my practice and all of us see it everyday in so many people we escort mersin read about and interact with in our individual lives. This is an article with some of my reflections on Anger. There are more articles in the section that explains my DVD and CD Set, “I’m Free From Anger Program”, that I made to specifically help people with Anger or those around them.
Thoughts on Anger
Anger is a strange emotion. Those who thrive on it are as ineffective as those who try to repress it completely. We all know what it is but none of us can fully agree on it’s legitimate purpose.
We have the phenomenon of the coach or supervisor telling a player or worker respectively to control his/her anger while another is told anger is something they need to express with aggressive people or in hopeless situations.
We think of the raging spouse in a drunken stupor bashing family members. We also think of the person we believe needs to get angry and stand up for his/her rights. In the latter situation, we may use the word “assertive” in place of angry, but it clearly is part of the overall anger continuum from being “annoyed” to “raging mad”.
The reason is logical why we have so many conflicting views on anger: Because anger in itself is neither good nor bad. The key is how we use it. Anger can save someone in a life- threatening crisis where defending self is critical. It also can destroy one’s relationships with others if one verbally or physically assaults them.
When we are treated unfairly, anger is an appropriate emotion; but only to the degree to resolve the problem. To be angry and to diplomatically express one’s feelings to someone if treated unfairly in the home or at work is a positive use of anger. To physically assault the person would be totally inappropriate. The ultimate irony in a physical attack is that the one who treats someone badly would become the victim because physical assaults are completely unacceptable in our society regardless of the anger provoking person or situation. Even a brutal verbal attack would be inappropriate under all but the most extreme provocations.
Rage is the far end of anger and is generally destructive to the “raging person” under the best of circumstances. Many persons in jail for assault, domestic and otherwise, may have been wronged, but their acts of rage far outweigh the gravity of what caused the anger.
Ongoing anger has a negative effect on one’s physical and mental health. Reducing the stress, anxiety, and depression that result from ongoing anger can help a person live a longer and healthier life.
It would be very difficult to find a happy person who is always filled with anger. The negative impact on persons around them is nearly as destructive as it is to themselves.