12-06-2022-Loving parents more and more are needing to decide how to help struggling poor decision making adult children who come to them for help. To be helpful and even coach an adult child struggling in life are reasonable parental activities. Most parents want to see their adult children be successful and are willing to help them. The slippery slope is to make sure they are not enabling them to continue ineffective,poor and even destructive decision making. The following are boundaries to this end: 1.Determine what the problem is and what you are willing to do. 2.Do not be moved by intimidation,guilt or threats. Examples like you can no longer see the grandchildren or them if you do not do what they want. 3.Keep your own emotions under control. 4.Recognize swooping in and ineffectively trying to save the day various times shows you are entering a negative co-dependent relationship that will only end badly. 5.Seek out family members,support groups and friends when emotional support is needed. 6.Do not expect your children to fulfill your emotional needs 7.Accept your not being involved after repeated failures is often the best process as painful as that may be emotionally. 8.Accept that loving your adult child may mean you must let them solve their own problems resulting from poor decision making without your involvement other than sought out advice and coaching. 9.Seek out clergy or an experienced therapist familiar with co-dependent relationships for emotional support as needed.