Tag: dealing with regret

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHAT FAILURE TEACHES US- subscribed to our YouTube page!

    WHAT FAILURE TEACHES US

    9-12-2023- All of us experience failure at one time or another. How we react to it is critically important for future success. We will achieve our goals that can make us feel successful and satisfied psychologically if we do not allow failure to sabotage us. My point is not to say that failure is a wonderful thing we should seek. No, my point is that everyone has failures in life and successful persons have learned from their failures and have made better decisions which leads to the successes they have in life. When someone gives up and becomes sad, disappointed, and even disillusioned by failures, and chooses not to continue the fight, then failure becomes the ruling psychological victor and the person runs the risk of seeing self as a victim with little or no chance for real success and happiness in life. One needs to see failure as a learning experience and begin the ongoing fight for success. The following would include what can be learned from failure: 1.Accept failure is a part of life we all experience. 2. Recognize that continuing to do something is the beginning of success. 3. Failure is part of reality. 4. Do not focus on what might have happened but focus on what can happen by learning from the failure. 5. Accept whatever blame you deserve in the failure and never take on the role of victim. 6. Never give up. As long as you are alive, there is always the opportunity for success and overcoming failure. 7. As devastating as can be a divorce,not getting a promotion,losing out on a love or getting fired, the key is to learn from these experiences and make every effort to not have them happen again. 8. Manage your time more effectively,because many failures are the result of not appropriately prioritizing what needs to be done to be successful and wasting a lot of needed time. 9.See failure as teaching us what we need to learn, as opposed to what we do not know. 10. Reduce the pain of failure by simply seeing it as part of the process to being successful. 11. Do not allow others to define you by your failures. You define yourself by your overcoming failures and being successful…My point here is not to minimize the emotional pain that failure can cause. No,my point is that failure is the first step to success by changing the process that failed and trying a new approach to lead to success. It is a positive mindset in the midst of failure. You may have to accept many failures before you reach the success you desire. Ted Williams became a great baseball hitter by constant study of the opposing pictchers and finely honing his batting skills. The whole process you are using may need to be altered or you may need new goals and projects. To never give up is the critical ingredient for success and overcoming failure.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss OVERCOMING REJECTION-

    OVERCOMING REJECTION

    Rejection is a common experience that everyone experiences in their life to one degree or another. It is often accompanied with anxiety,depression and low self-esteem. It is a painful experience and how we react to it determines how we will overcome it and even use it to our advantage. Rejection can relate to love, family experiences, friendships , career opportunities/promotions, or a myriad of things that one encounters in life. The important thing is not to allow rejection to devastate your self-esteem. Sadly, this happens to many persons and they are never able to fulfill their potential to become that happy and successful human being that is within them. The following are things to do to help you overcome rejection: 1.Accept rejection is a part of life. 2.Accept how you react to rejection will have a strong influence on how happy is your life. 3.Accept what happened even as you do not like it. 4.Visualize a better future and do things to make it become reality. 5. Do not allow rejection to ever define who you are. 6. Grow from your experience and learn from it. 7. Avoid unproductive continuous thinking about your rejection. 8.Surround yourself with positivity. 9. If rejected in love, recognize the other person was not where you are, and be aware that was not the right situation for you. 10.Pamper self with understanding and compassion. 11.Recognize there is a rainbow and clear sunny skies ahead of the stormy life you are experiencing. 12.If bypassed for a job or promotion, recognize you were not prepared for the job or move on to a new position that will appropriately take into account your abilities. 13.Seek out friends who you can discuss your rejection with and who can help you navigate your feelings and give you better perspective. 14.Seek out an experienced therapist who can help guide you through your rejection in your current situation or maybe your overall outlook on rejection to help you function more effectively in life…Implementing some of these suggestions will predictably help you deal more effectively with rejection. With that said, rejection is painful and how we address it psychologically impacts how happy we will be in our lives.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 discuss HOW TO OVERCOME TIME BLINDNESS

    7-25-2023

    How to overcome time blindness

    Do you have the condition of TIME BLINDNESS? Even though a hallmark of ADHD,it is also common with persons with Autism, significant Anxiety,grief and Depression. It makes for a very difficult time for the person and those they interact with in all life activities. Punctuality is a trait highly respected and required to be successful in most settings. Is fact, approximately 15% of firings result from persons not being timely at work. Many persons with this condition may actually do a fine job, but lose their jobs because they are consistently late. Typical problems other than employment,even if with the best intentions, include constantly missing deadlines,not paying bills on time, forgetting important dates,not showing up for appointments or showing up very late or even the wrong time. This can be exasperating for other persons involved in their lives as well as for them. It can lead to not receiving a job, losing a job, hurting relationships and causing poor self esteem. Suggestions to overcome TIME BLINDNESS would include always wearing a watch,planning your day the day before in as specific detail as possible,do not allow the immediate interest of the moment to sabotage the day,avoid time traps electronic or with persons,have reminders to go off on your phone,start thinking of what you will do before the time you will begin,check off your daily activities as you complete them and add in breaks and additional time for projects to get them done and not end up rushing to complete them at the last minute.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHY PERFECTIONISM OFTEN LEADS TO DEPRESSION

    WHY PERFECTIONISM OFTEN LEADS TO DEPRESSION

    If one thinks about it, it is not surprising that a perfectionist often ends up being depressed. Common symptoms of depression that a perfectionist experiences would include sadness, pessimism,negativity, painful memories of present and past less than perfect behavior,loss of pleasure,feeling guilty for perceived imperfections, poor self-esteem, very critical of self and feelings of worthlessness. Not all perfectionists experience all of these characteristics, but for sure, seeking and even demanding perfection in a very imperfect world can easily lead one to be unhappy with self, and then with most if not all other persons in their lives. Another cause of sadness for a pessimist is loneliness as they often have very poor relations with other persons. It is not bad enough that they expect perfection in themselves, but they also expect perfection in others. Because no one is perfect, and the perfectionist demands it, even slight imperfections can lead to anger and dismissal of persons as friends because they do not meet the perfectionistic standard…Strategies to reduce depression caused by perfectionism would include tolerance,humor,recognizing excellence is not a synonym for perfect,no one is perfect or anything else on earth,mindful positive thinking,replacing negative thoughts with positive ones and loving and accepting you as you are. A trained therapist aware of how to help a depressed person caused by their perfectionism might be considered and be helpful.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss Positive and Negative Guilt

    June 6, 2023 Guilt is a very difficult thing for most persons to get right. Therapists will tell you that a good percentage of their clients suffer from some form of guilt. The problem is knowing what is positive guilt versus negative guilt. Positive guilt is when a person is aware they have done something wrong to another person and tries to make amends as best as can be done,and then let’s it go. This can be done by directly talking to the person and indicating they have done wrong and trying to do whatever can best be done to overcome the harm that has been caused and make things right. Problems occur when a person carries guilt even after they have done all they can to correct it. This does not mean the person has not done wrong, but to carry guilt for something that is resolved or cannot be resolved is a waste of time and can drag a person down. This does not mean the person does not have some bad feelings about what has been done, but is aware to carry guilt around will drag them down emotionally and interfere with their own psyche and interactions with other persons. It also can result in someone playing the role of martyr, which is not healthy for anyone involved. The martyr uses guilt to control a person with guilt that never ends. Negative guilt is the type that manifests itself with poor self-esteem, unrealistic expectations of what one can do, and often feeling guilty for things they have no control. An example would be something a mayor has done in a city that somehow the citizen feels they are guilty. To feel bad about something that a mayor has done is reasonable, but it is not reasonable to carry guilt and feel bad for something they have no control. It is a clear waste of time and can lead not only to poor self esteem but also anxiety,shame,social withdrawal,insomnia and depression. Another example would be if a relative or friend does something wrong and somehow the person carries the guilt for the act or behavior when in reality they have no control over what has occurred. A person with reasonable guilt is able to recognize when they do wrong and the recognition of what they have done and the attempt to resolve it will build strength, not only in themselves but in their relationships with others. This is the goal of a person who means well, but is aware that human beings fail and the best of us make mistakes that can hurt other persons. It is also important persons learn from what occurred and not do it again.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss FINDING YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE IS CRITICAL TO YOUR SELF ESTEEM AS A HUMAN BEING

    FINDING YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE

    Considering life on earth is a one time experience,each of us needs to seek out our purpose that can give us maximum happiness while helping others as best we can and not harming others. When you consider the anger,anxiety and depression so many people have,it is clear literally millions of persons have not found their purpose in life. A simple way to determine if you have meaningful purpose in life is simply to ask yourself,”Am I happy and satisfied with my life”. If not,then you need to determine what would give you purpose and resulting happiness. Others can advise and help you,but only you can determine this yourself. You are the pilot of the voyage only you can take in your life. While there are many others,the following singularly or combined are typical factors that lead to a life with purpose: 1. Faith in God, and our eternal life thereafter. 2.Having a meaningful relationship with a partner in marriage, or a significant other relationship. 3.Raising children to be loving, caring, and effective human beings. 4. Achieving success in sports, education, broadcasting,computers,medicine, law, engineering, farming, skilled trades, etc. to your maximum potential or your chosen level. 5. Making a difference in the lives of others by helping them to be happy and successful human beings finding their purpose in life.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss LOVING AND EFFECTIVE GRANDPARENTS RESPECT PARENTAL RIGHTS

    May 23, 2023

    There are few things more joyful in life than spending time to love on our grandchildren. We want to pamper,hug and spoil then whenever we are with them. However,problems can occur when grandparents interfere with the parenting of their children. Problems can be even worse when interfering with the parenting of the son or daughter-in-law. It is critical grandparents respect how their children raise their children and not interfere. As grandparents made errors in parenting,so will their children. As grandparents learned to parent,even though making many mistakes,they learned along the way as will their children. Giving advice is not recommended unless asked for or there is real danger for the child. I can attest in both my experiences as a long time Psychologist and walking the road of life that many grandparents have little or no contact with their grandchildren because they tried to replace their children as parents or were seen as intrusive and interfering. The following are statements to avoid that can be considered toxic: YOU DID THAT WRONG…I WOULD HAVE HANDLED THAT VERY DIFFERENTLY…LET ME RESOLVE THIS PROBLEM…YOU WILL NEVER BE A GOOD PARENT… I RAISED YOU TO BE A BETTER PARENT THAN YOU ARE.. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN CHILDREN… YOU ARE NOT TREATING THEM RIGHT…YOU WILL DESERVE THEIR HATRED WHEN THEY GROW UP…I DO NOT MEAN TO INTERFERE,BUT….

    Dr Braccio Mike Austin of 1320 AM WILS discuss LIVING IN THE NOW- Subscribe to our page!

    May 16, 2023 Live in THE NOW and enjoy it is my advice to one and all. Life is an ongoing one way ticket to wherever our abilities,efforts and opportunities take us. It is important to remember the one way ticket has an inescapable ending. Yesterday is a memory and the future may or may not happen for us. “Here today and gone tomorrow”— is an adage to always keep in mind. Goals are critical for ongoing happiness in THE NOW,but we must enjoy the ride of life. I would predict no one at the end of life says the following: 1.I WISH I WORRIED MORE ABOUT THINGS THAT DID NOT MATTER OR NEVER HAPPENED. 2.I WISH I SPENT LESS TIME WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS I HAVE LOVED IN LIFE. 3.I WISH I HAD MORE SENSELESS ANGER AND ARGUMENTS WITH PEOPLE THAT LOVED AND CARED FOR ME. 4.I WISH I TOOK MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO SABOTAGE MY HAPPINESS IN LIFE BY NOT ATTEMTING TO REALIZE MY DREAMS. We need to tune out all the negative and distracting noise we can in our electronically connected world. With mindfulness,we need to notice and live each day enjoying what we experience. Each day is a kaleidoscope of experiences we can mindfully be aware and joyfully experience. The alternative is to dwell in the past or focus on the future in a way THE NOW is squandered and not lived and enjoyed. Do not let that happen to you. You can never COULD HAVE,SHOULD HAVE,OUGHT TO HAVE DONE SOMETHING. The past is over. All we can do is enjoy the good memories in THE NOW and learn from the bad ones.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SURVIVING A SPOUSE/PARTNER WITH ADHD

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    May 9, 2023

    SURVIVING A SPOUSE/PARTNER WITH ADHD

    This is a followup discussion from last week on how adults with ADHD often feel misunderstood. Today we discuss how a spouse/partner survives the lack of focus,inattention,procrastination,clutter,chaos,irritability and seeming lack of caring in some combination that a person with ADHD brings to the long term relationship. Data shows divorces are twice as likely when a spouse/partner has ADHD. The important thing to remember is that your ADHD spouse is in common language wired differently. Together youneed to honestly look at the needs of each other and decide what strategies you can use to best live and love each other. One thing not to do is to become the parent in the relationship. Giving cues on things that need to get done or to begin shortly can be helpful as long as they are respected as helpful and undertaken. Recognize distraction may not be disrespectful but accept it within acceptable limits. Recognize irritability may be a symptom and accept it as long as you are not disrespected. Being chronically late or not getting things done on time can be exasperating as can be forgetting important dates and agreed upon activities. Together you can work out strategies to overcome these common problem areas. If you cannot overcome the frustrations that result in these or other problems tigger,singly and/or as a couple you can seek out professional expert therapists in ADHD.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss ADULTS WITH ADHD OFTEN FEEL MISUNDERSTOOD

    Subscribe to our page! 05-02-2023 A major part of our practice relates to ADHD evaluations. ADHD evaluations for adults in our offices as opposed to children are a growing percentage that now comprises at least half or more of them. Diagnosed adults often feel misunderstood due to a recognized medical health condition in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-5 that many still do not believe exists. To the contrary,they see persons with ADHD symtoms of lack of focus,inattention,distractibility,chaos,forgetfulness ,procrastination,not paying attention in conversations or butting into them as being self-centered and insensitive and use ADHD to excuse their not achieving or being a good person overall. To reinforce these negative thoughts,at times the person with ADHD can be very effective and not showing some or all of the ADHD symtoms. This is because when highly motivated to do something,which is critical,the person with ADHD can function effectively. The problem is it is very hard for the person with ADHD to find things that generate the attention and interest levels to the point there is success by being committed to the activity. Games,sports and specific academic areas can reach these interest levels. Reported successful persons with ADHD would include Bill Gates,Michael Jordon,Albert Einstein,John F. Kennedy,Jim Carey and Michael Phelps

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss BINGE EATING DISORDER

    April 11, 2023 Subscribe to our YouTube page!

    Binge Eating Disorder is often a very solitary condition where the person with the condition has depression,anxiety and low self esteem. Even if it only impacts three percent of the population in the United States,it is a real problem if you are one of the nearly 4,000,000 persons with this condition. Common characteristics of Binge Eating Disorder would include the following: 1.Eating alone or in secret. 2.Eating when not hungry. 3.Feeling a loss of control over eating. 4.Eating quickly. 5.History of binge eating associated with it reducing anxiety,depression,loneliness,failure,OCD tendencies. 6.Feeling anxiety,guilt,depression,shame due to the binge eating. 7.Failing on one diet after another. 8.Obesity occurs with many persons. 9.Continuing to eat even when uncomfortably full. 10.Binge eating at least 1 day a week for 3 months…If one feels they have Binge Eating Disorder and they cannot control it,a good person to start with is the family physician. This is particularly true when a parent becomes aware their child has it. Treatment often includes a team including a dietitian,medical doctor and trained therapist with eating disorders.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM SIGNS A MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP IS OVER OR COMING TO AN END

    Subscribe to our YouTube page! 04-04-2023

    The headlines generally are about fiery and angry divorces that never seem to end. A prime example of such a couple ending a relationship would be the defamation case between Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. Spouses often seem more like combatants who can for the rest of their lives literally detest each other. While that sadly is too often true,what we are discussing today are the millions of divorces or relationships that end simply because they slowly have lost the love,energy and excitement that propelled them into fulfilling relationships filled with love and satisfaction. Sometimes the progress of relationship erosion is barely payed attention to until the feelings and desire are gone to save the marriage or relationship. The unfortunate result is a quiet and uneventful ending often filled with disappointment and a difficult rupture for children and loved ones. The following would be signs that the relationship is over, or is coming to an end: 1.Spouses/partners feel a lack of love and caring.2.Lack of sharing communication about their lives. 3.Building major parts of their lives away from the other. 4.Not planning for the future with mutual activities or dreams. 5.Lack of physical and emotional intimacy. 6.Not caring for the needs of the other. 7.New boundaries within the relationship building up. 8.Wanting to always be with others outside of the marriage/relationship or within it. 9.Insensitivity on a regular basis. 10.No desire to save the marriage or relationship.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin discuss HOW TO SENSITIVELY INTERACT WITH THOSE IN CHRONIC DAILY PAIN OR PAINFUL LIFE THREATENING ILLNESS

    12-13-2022

    Persons with chronic pain or painful life threatening illness often suffer from depression,insomnia,anxiety,stress,anger,substance/alcohol abuse and even hopelessness and suicide. A further problem is persons with chronic pain or illness often feel isolated because persons often do not know how to interact with them because they cannot relate to their problems even if they understand it would be very difficult if not horrible to always be in chronic pain or a painful life threatening illness. Based on long term experience with persons on both sides of this situation,the following are recommendations meant to help persons interact sensitively and effectively with those in chronic pain or chronically ill: 1.Be open and honest. 2.Listen to how their condition impacts them both physically and emotionally. 3.Be tolerant to a possible uncharacteristic negative and even angry mood. 4.Make sure the meeting is not about you and your feelings or pains. 5.Let them know you care and will be helpful any way possible. 6.Do not compare their situation with someone else. 7.Use active listening to fully understand their feelings. 8,Read up on the effects of chronic pain and illness on someone both psychologically and physically.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss LOCUS OF CONTROL IN YOUR LIFE

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    11-15-2022

    Locus of Control is something very important in determining how you look at life. If you believe in “internal locus of control”,then you have the belief you can control what is going on in your life. Preparation,planning and training dominate the thinking and direction you have in your life. But if you believe in “external locus of control”,then you are basically feeling life happens to you and you do not have control over it. You are like a leaf driven by the wind to unknown places. Each day can be filled with dread and fears about what may occur. Research shows high achievement and positive self-image are enhanced by the belief you determine your successes and failures by your decisions. However,there is little doubt successes are strongly influenced by opportunities and circumstances one may have little control. Illness and lack of opportunities can halt and negatively impact the success and self-esteem of almost anyone. A reasonable view to have good mental health is to have a mixture of both. Believe you can control what you can in yourself but also recognize opportunities can occur separate from your plans and preparation. 

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM LET GETTING OLDER BE AN EXCITING VOYAGE

    September 27, 2022

    We live in an age where ageism or getting older is seen as something to be dreaded and avoided at all costs. We can easily see this as people rush to plastic surgeons and the latest cosmetics advertised on TV to keep us young and ever younger yet! This is unfortunate because more and more research is showing that persons who see getting older has advantages with things to look forward to are not only happier but live longer than those who do not. This does not diminish the reality of physical decline and death. The focus on living positively as we get older is the proverbial view it is better to see the glass half filled rather than half empty. The following are things to look forward to as we get older:
    1.You need not worry about dying young! (The Roman Cicero noted this is his classic work ,ON OLD AGE.) 2.Recognizing our mortality can have us cherish each day we live. 3.More leisure time to think and do things. 4.Learn new things. 5.Nurture and rekindle long term friendships and family connections. 6.Strengthen love with spouse/partner and children. 7.Make amends for mistreatment of others in our past or even present. 8.Share the lessons learned in life. 9.Focus on what one remembers rather than what one forgets. Also remember a 20 or 30 year old has far less to remember than a 50-90 year old. 10.Develop one’s spiritual outlook and direction. 11.Do good and make the world better before you leave it. 12.Focus on what you can do rather than what you cannot. 13.Carpe diem—Seize the day and enjoy it. 14.With gusto,look forward to the future!

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss WHY “FOLLOWING THE CROWD” IS BAD FOR DEVELOPING YOUR INDIVIDUALITY AS A HUMAN BEING”

    It will guarantee you mediocrity in life. It is reasonable to be a good citizen and do what is required as a good citizen and family person. However, to just go along with any current trend will guarantee you will not stand out as is possible when you search for and follow your dreams and not those that others have decided for you. My work over the decades as a practicing psychologist has shown me so many crowd followers who are leading lives that are not satisfying and they sometimes even have significant depression and anxiety because they are living the choices of the crowd for them and not their own. One must not accept a specific crowd view that life is against you and just sit back and accept it. The life of a crowd designated victim is tragic if the person accepts it. The free thinking individual will see the normal problems in life that each person has as opportunities for resolution rather than overpowering problems to fold under. They play as best they can the cards life has dealt them. If one is in a crowd that promotes low possibilities for you,leave it immediately and find persons and groups that promote your possibilities as a person. Too often, persons see problems as reasons they run with the crowd as they just decide to settle for whatever life they can have and try to enjoy it. While this may work for many,it guarantees a life of mediocrity. They will not experience the excitement and exhilarating experience in life from voyaging out on their own. The following are some specific reasons why following the crowd or the flock will not help you reach the exciting heights you can experience when following your dreams with the resulting life excitement and happiness through their fulfillment. 1.Doing what everyone else does guarantees you a life of mediocrity. 2.Fads come and go. We do not hopefully just lead a life going from one fad to another. 3.Highly successful persons do not follow the crowd. 4.Individual growth as an individual is best done when following your own developed goals. 5.Following the golden rule—DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU—needs to be the gold standard we use in dealing with others and not those determined by the crowd. 6.The crowd is often wrong. One classic example is when Galileo knew the earth moved but the “crowd” said it did not.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss THE PERILS OF WORK BURNOUT/DEPRESSION

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    September 6, 2022

    Work Burnout/Depression is when persons cannot function effectively at work due to symptoms of Depression overpowering them psychologically. It is sadly more common than many would think. I put them both together because persons with Work Burnout predictably have some level of Depression. Both the employer and person suffering from Work Burnout/Depression must be on the lookout for this horribly debilitating condition and control it as soon as possible. Common symptoms persons have to one degree or another would include the following: 1. Persistent sad and unhappy mood. 2.Feelings of hopelessness, pessimism and helplessness. 3. Unusual increase in absences and poor work performance. 4.Excessive use of alcohol,prescription drugs and/or illegal substances. 5.Fatigue with low levels of energy. 6.Loss of interest in usual daily activities. 7.Changes in eating patterns which can result in noticeable weight gain or loss. 8.Crying. 9.High anxiety sometimes with accompanying panic attacks. 10. Tardiness or sleepiness resulting from sleep problems. 11. Irritability and anger issues resulting in conflicts with other persons. 12. Persistent physical symptoms or pains, including the common cold, that do not respond to typical medical treatment. 13.Unpredictable and unexplained bowel disturbances,headaches or stomach problems. 14.Problems concentrating. 15.Becoming cynical with self,others and life. 16.Lack of control. 17. Nebulous job expectations. 18.Dysfunctional work environment. 19.Suicide ideation…If you or your employer notice some of the symptoms above,it is important to seek out support as needed from family,co-workers,clergy,EAP(Employee Assistance Program),and trained therapists…Depression Is a major national concern. The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that among adults of 18 and older in 2020 that 21 million adults have had at least one major depressive episode. This amounts to 8.9% of the population. When you add Job Burnout to the mix, you can see this is a very troubling situation We all need to do our part to help persons be able to work without the psychologically and physically debilitating condition of Work Depression/Burnout.

    Dr Braccio & MikeAustin discuss WHEN NOT HAVING CHILDREN OR BEING MARRIED IS THE RIGHT LIFE CHOICE

    WHEN NOT HAVING CHILDREN OR BEING MARRIED IS THE RIGHT LIFE CHOICE- Subscribe to our page! August 23, 2022 In our society, being married and having children have long been considered the appropriate lifestyle. While this may be true for most persons, it is not true for everyone. One can draw some conclusions from the fact that 50% of marriages fail and many children are not offered good parental guidance and support from their parents. There even are sadly too many children who are abused emotionally,sexually and physically. Arguably, much of this could be relieved by many persons accepting their true personalities and realize their desires in life are such that being married and having children are not right for them and can be catastrophic for themselves,spouses and children. How often do we hear adults indicate one or both of their parents had no business ever being married and having children? Our society would be far more effective if persons who have no business being married and having children did neither. This simply acknowledges that long-term life relationships filled with love and the caring for children does not fit the mold for many persons and they and society would be better off if they chose to use their skills in different directions that could contribute much to the development of a safer,more cohesive and more effective society and country. Personality factors that would show a person is not someone to enter a life long commitment to a partner or raising children in a loving and effective manner would include the following: 1.Narcissistic 2.Explosive Personality/Verbal Abuser. 3.Sociopathic. 4.Selfish/Self-Absorbed. 5.Egotistical. 6.Career Driven. 7.Workaholic. 8.Infidelity. 9.Life Mission. 10.Immature. 11.Emotionally Unstable. 12.Physical Abuser/Batterer. 13.Pathological Liar. 14.Manipulator. 15.Emotionally Controlled By Parents. 16.Alcoholic/Substance Abuser. 17.Habitual Gambler…Something positive is that persons can overcome many of these areas of concern by being authentic with themselves and seeking support as needed from family,friends clergy and well trained therapists.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss PERFECTIONISTS ARE NEVER AT PSYCHOLOGICAL PEACE

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    Perfectionists are persons who strive for perfection in all aspects of their lives. Unless you are someone like a heart surgeon or a jet pilot, perfection is not something for individuals to seek in themselves or someone else. Perfectionists are never at psychological peace because they are trying to be perfect in a very imperfect world. If you are a perfectionist, it is clearly time to kick this aspect of your personality out into the trash can where it belongs. It is amazing to me after decades as a practicing psychologist how many persons do not see the negative impact that perfectionism is having on them psychologically and also the negative impact it has in their relations with others. Typical characteristics would include the following: 1.Seeking not excellence but perfection from self in all attempted activities. 2.Constant disappointment by never being able to be perfect. 3.Poor self-image due to not living up to being perfect,regardless of how successful they might be. 4.Problems in relationships with others because of expecting them to meet this perfect standard that not only they cannot meet but no one else can. 5.Excessive amounts of time doing what are routine activities to other persons due to the desire to do them perfectly. Things as simple as cutting the grass, cleaning the house and reviewing a work document can lead to seemingly limitless amounts of time trying to get them right and psychological distress it not feeling they are ever done perfectly. 6.The inability to delegate because others cannot do tasks perfectly. 7.Elevated levels of Anxiety and Depression caused by the impossibly of being perfect. 8.Not enjoying the happy times that persons psychologically need because of the constant emphasis on being perfect in the never ending process of activities they are trying to do perfectly…If some of these characteristics sound like you,now is the time to end this life robbing personality behavior that will not allow psychological peace. Work on it yourself or seek out experienced expert help.