Tag: ocd

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER (OCD) AND YOUR CHILD

    November 28, 2023- As we previously discussed, Obsessive-Compulsive DISORDER (OCD) can be a torturous psychological condition for even the brightest and most talented of persons. The cycle of obsessive thoughts seemingly only reduced by compulsive behaviors in a never ending cycle ,if not controlled, can greatly disrupt the life of the person with the condition. It can be particularly devastating psychologically for children and adolescents who do not understand what it is and believe it is normal that they can overcome obsessive thoughts by believing the compulsive behaviors will satisfy or eliminate them. OCD can alter the personality of the person with anger and high anxiety when someone tells them to stop these compulsive behaviors they believe must be done. Common obsessive thoughts and resulting compulsions include dirt which leads to constant washing of hands, constant reinforcement that what they are doing is right, extreme orderliness with clothes or whatever, belief they must pray over and over again to be forgiven for some wrong from the past,present or future, believing the compulsive behavior can save a life or disaster, and the belief their obsessive thoughts and resulting behaviors are normal and necessary to avert whatever is the fear they are eliminating . An additional concern is that anxiety, depression, insomnia,eating disorders and even suicide ideation can be side effects resulting from OCD. The following are suggestions on how to help your child or teenager suffering from OCD: 1. Do not believe it is a mental health condition your child will just grow out of. 2. Seek out an experienced therapist in treating OCD. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in the form of Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) is considered the gold standard for mental health treatment. 3. Talk to your family physician or pediatrician to discuss possible medication. There are medications such as the SSRIs that have been helpful in the treatment of children and adolescents with OCD. They are usually used with moderate to severe OCD. 4. Family counseling can often be helpful so everyone is working together. 5. In a sensitive manner, parents need to help their children realize OCD is a mental health condition that needs to be eliminated as much as possible. Children cannot be allowed to believe the behavior is normal.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss “DO NOT ALLOW PAST MISTAKES AND “WHAT IFS” RUIN YOUR PRESENT

    11-14-2023- Learning from mistakes in the past is a good thing to do. Thinking about things that we might have done in the past and wondering how they might have turned out can be interesting and also a good thing. These thoughts become a problem psychologically when we become overwhelmed by mistakes and perceived mistakes we made in the past and relive them and cannot be happy in the now. The anxiety creating “what iffing”is a classic cause of anxiety and can also lead to psychological turmoil by not being happy in the present and thinking about all the wonderful things that the person believes would have occurred if they had only done certain things. Of course,no one knows how events would have worked out on a choice not made. One cannot allow self to be negatively impacted by the past. If you find past mistakes or perceived loss of opportunities are causing you psychological grief,the following are suggestions to be happy in the present and not relive real and perceived mistakes in the past. 1. You can never COULD HAVE,SHOULD HAVE,MIGHT HAVE or OUGHT HAVE. Live in the NOW and do what you can. 2. Learn from your mistakes and use them as lessons in learning what not to do. Do not focus on them and cause yourself emotional pain. 3. As appropriate,advise others how to not make the mistakes you have made. This is a good way to feel better about your mistakes. 4. Do not emotionally torture yourself by replaying verbal and social interactions where you feel you embarrassed yourself. Learn from them. 5. If you cannot do this on your own,you can seek a therapist to help you experienced in such matters to guide you.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HOW TO COPE WITH ENVIOUS PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE

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    November 7, 2023

    Last week we talked about the tortured life of the envious person. This week we are going to talk about how persons cope with the envious persons in their lives. Because we live in a competitive society where being number one or the best in their field is often the goal, it is not unusual there is a lot of envy in persons who do not reach that level of success. There also are envious persons who do not try to be number one but nevertheless are envious of hard working high achievers who they compare themselves unfavorably. Envious persons also can be envious of persons they see as greater or more successful. Because there is so much envy in the world, and envy is a part of every person even if to a minimal degree, it is important persons learn how to deal with envious persons. We do not need to worry about persons who are envious of us but do nothing more than being envious. With them, we can be positive and supportive of their positive traits and achievements. To those who are envious and we are not aware, there is nothing we can do. The problem is when persons are envious and try to undermine us in our lives,they can be just out and out sarcastic and mean to our face. They also try to undermine us when we are not around them and they are with others. Rather than being overwhelmed emotionally and feeling horrible because people are envious of us and try to undermine us, it is important we learn how to safeguard our self-esteem and confront such persons. The following are strategies to use to cope with the envious person who negatively impacts on us at whatever level in our lives. 1. Confront a person and stand up for yourself, and do not allow yourself to be bullied or treated unfairly. 2. Let the person know you are aware of their envy. Let them know you are not happy about it and are willing to confront them if they become sarcastic or try to undermine you in one way or another. 3. Try to talk to the person and indicate the behavior puts a strain on the friendship or whatever relationship there is, and that it could end it. 4. End the relationship with the person completely and recognize they are toxic to you and your life is far better without them in it. 5. If you must interact with them due to family, mutual friends, joint leisure activities etc., then keep your distance and always be on guard and willing to stand up for yourself as necessary. 6. As appropriate, ignore the person and let them say as they will with no need for any more interactions. 7. Be happy with who you are and what you have achieved,and never allow others to define you. 8. As felt necessary, seek out an experienced therapist to help guide you when dealing with envious persons.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss THE TORTURED LIFE OF THE ENVIOUS PERSON

    Subscribe to our page! 10-31-2023 Envy can be torturous to a person who constantly desires the good fortune they perceive someone else is experiencing and are very upset emotionally they do not have it. It is a case where a person does not look at the benefits and gifts they have in life but constantly compare themselves with others and do it in a negative way. They can be envious of someone they perceive as better looking, having better luck, having more wealth, having a better personality, coming from a better family, having a more attractive spouse, having a better circle of friends, or any other thing that someone could be envious. The result is that the person suffers a form of emotional pain because they do not have what the other person has. It can be positive if it inspires someone to try harder to achieve something. That would be a positive type of envy. But today we are talking about the type of envy that hurts the person emotionally, and from which some persons never recover in their lives as they constantly find things to be envious. It is the rather odd phenomenon of counting the blessings of others and underestimating their own. The end result is psychological hurt and frustration.The causes of envy are often low self-esteem caused by difficulties in one’s youth. They can relate to poverty or feelings of not being treated fairly at home and in life. There also are competitive persons who simply must be number one even in areas they clearly are not. It is not by accident that envy is considered one of the seven deadly sins. At its worst,envy can lead to mocking the person for their perceived superiority or one can use sarcasm and other passive-aggressive strategies to undermine the person that one has envy. Ways to overcome envy would include the following: 1. Count and appreciate your own blessings and achievements! 2. Develop a sense of happiness that others have their blessings. 3. Make envy positive by improving yourself in areas that previously caused envy. 4. never compare yourself with others except for self improvement. Love yourself! 5. Accept you are an envious person and determine to overcome it. 6. Make changes in your own life to help eliminate envy. 7. Seek and find spiritual satisfaction to help overcome worldly envy and be happier. 8. If you feel it would be helpful, seek out a trained therapist with a person who is experienced in helping persons with envy.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin discuss HELPFUL SUGGESTIONS FOR DEALING WITH A DIFFICULT CHILD

    October 24, 2023- A person is very fortunate who has not had a difficult child at one time or another during the period they were being raised. In my work with parents trying to learn how to deal with a difficult child, my point is not to find fault with parenting techniques that have been used up to that time, but rather to try to find the best way for the parents to be able to work with a difficult child in the here and now. An important thing to remember is that children do not misbehave simply because they desire to do it. There is a reason for the behavior. It can be a parent is too strict or too lax. There are many other reasons that the misbehavior can occur. The important thing is to try to learn why is your child being so difficult with you. If it is hard to determine from all the possibilities ranging from a child wanting to control the house to a child simply desiring attention and willing to accept negative attention versus no attention,do not worry. The important thing is to try the following strategies to help you and your child: 1. Recognize you are a parent and your job is to model good behavior and not allow you or your child to be rude or disrespectful. 2. Regardless of what has happened to the present, you need to set up boundaries on what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. 3. Keep control of your own emotions and not allow your child to create a sibling-like relationship with you that simply devolves into constant arguing and disagreement. 4. Seek out when your child is behaving appropriately and praise them at that time. The goal is to encourage and reinforce appropriate behavior. Too often the parent says nothing when the child is behaving appropriately for the risk of beginning a conflict. 5. Reward good behavior when possible with compliments and potentially with desired activities or things as long as it is not simply a child being good to receive rewards. It is important to remember that when children behave as desired,we often do good things for them and see it as appropriate. 6. Have few rules in the house and enforce them with consequences that the child is aware of with no surprises. 7. As possible, have family discussions where there can be agreements on what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior, and what are the consequences for inappropriate behavior. When this occurs, and you and the child are aware their activities have led to the resulting consequences,they then must accept the consequences as their own making. Successful family discussions relating to appropriate behaviors are not simple to do but something to work on as a family over a period of time. What are acceptable behaviors by you can also be part of the plan. 8.. Take into account your own temperament and personality when dealing with your child. It is very possible the temperament and personality of your child are quite different from you and this leads to a lot of the bumping heads that is occurring between you. Try to use an approach that takes into account the needs of your personality as well as that of your child. Understanding these differences can be critical in developing good communication between the two of you. 9. Recognize situations where there are high risks of problems occurring and plan accordingly for how you will react to them. 10. Make sure you focus on the problem of the moment and do not bring in previous problems lest the discussion become one of a list of problems and not a resolution of a current one. 11. Seek out a therapist who can help your child behave more appropriately and potentially do family counseling. 10. Seek out an experienced therapist in family dynamics who can help guide you to be a more effective parent for both you and your child.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss BE PREPARED PSYCHOLOGICALLY FOR RETIREMENT

    October 10, 2023:

    BE PREPARED PSYCHOLOGICALLY FOR RETIREMENT

    I have learned in my work as a psychologist over the decades that persons when getting ready to retire, often do it with planning about their physical and financial conditions. Without a doubt,these are important areas to evaluate when you consider retirement. The problem is too often persons do not think about what the impact retirement will have on them psychologically. For example, a job is more than something a person simply spends time at. No,a job impacts a person’s self esteem, friendships, and image to all persons they meet and interact with. Being a farmer, psychologist, bookkeeper , physician , governmental worker, factory worker, radio broadcaster, etc., is a major part of who they are. When they retire, they become a “retired person” and people see them as such. This can be fine for many persons, but many others do not realize the importance their job had on them in relation to status, levels of friendship, levels of authority and the constant interaction and challenges in the workplace. One needs to prepare for such a radical change to their lives. Even persons who did not like their jobs can miss the relationships and interactions that were meaningful to them on a day to day basis. I have known and worked with many persons who were not prepared for the significant changes that occur in their life after retirement. The “golden retirement years” can be depressing , lonely, and demoralizing when the person feels isolated,bored and even without purpose. They can even feel guilty at their failure to feel fulfilled with their retirement . A recent AARP study found 57% of retired persons say they had not prepared psychologically for retirement. The following are some suggestions to help a person be psychologically ready to retire: 1.Make sure you want to do it and are ready psychologically. 2.Do not let age be the primary retirement determinant. I will be 80 years old this week and have never thought a day of retiring. 3.See retirement as a new phase of your life with new goals and challenges. 4.Look for new dreams to be fulfilled. 5.Join new groups and rekindle old friendships. 6.Enhance family and spousal relationships. 7.Complete desired educational goals you desire to complete. 8.Meet with a therapist experienced in dealing with mental health of persons preparing to retire as well as retired persons. 9.Further develop your sense of spirituality and purpose in life.

    THE PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE OF OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR(OCD)

    August 29, 2023 Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder(OCD) can psychologically torture a person with a constant cycle of obsessing on an act or thought,having severe anxiety about eliminating it and completing a compulsive act or thought to relieve the sometimes debilitating anxiety. While the OCD sequence can relate to a seemingly almost endless list of thoughts and behaviors,they very commonly occur with extreme cleanliness and hatred of dirt or germs,hand washing,hoarding,keeping things in a rigid or symmetrical manner, numbers, and making sure over and over again you have locked the door or turned out the lights. A good example is the person constantly washing their hands and can only relieve the belief their hands are not dirty by constantly washing them again and again in an endless cycle. I remember a house hoarder who could no longer put things in his house buying another house to reduce his anxiety! An important thing to remember is that everyone has some activities they are very concerned about completing and getting them right. Wanting to have an orderly room or clean hands would be reasonable things for a person to desire and do. It becomes a problem when the OCD symptoms begin to interfere in the life of the person and the resulting anxiety and attempting to resolve it with rituals and time consuming activities and thoughts impact negatively on a person’s life that a person meets the diagnosis of OCD. It also is important to note that OCD symptoms can overlap with anxiety , ADHD, and depression to name a few. It is not unusual for a person with OCD to have additional diagnoses. Over the years, I have talked to many persons with OCD and can verify the condition can really be torturous for the person psychologically. I have talked to persons who are so concerned about food in a restaurant that they will pick through it with a fork and knife to make sure there are no bugs or other forms of dirt in it. Others who will not go to a restaurant out of utterly unreasonable fears of food contamination. Additionally, I have known persons so obsessed with how safe the air they are breathing or the water they are drinking that they are never comfortable with them to the point they are always checking them. This negatively impacts on their ability to function in all areas of their lives…If you feel you have OCD or some of the symptoms are growing and interfering with your psychological well-being,now is a good time to obtain an evaluation by an experienced psychologist in OCD and and also talk to your family physician or pediatrician to take back control of your life. .

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss HOW TO EMOTIONALLY WEATHER THE DEATH OF OUR LOVING PARENTS

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    There are few things in life more emotionally painful and harder to get over than the death of our loving parents. I personally have lost both parents and think of them and our experiences together on a regular basis since their passing 41 years and 24 years ago respectively. Even for those who had rocky relationships with their parents,the loss is still very significant. The person in effect is an orphan losing their life giving parents who not only brought them into the world but often raised and loved them unconditionally up until their deaths. While grieving is a very personal thing,the emotional pain is intense and loaded with emotional minefields. The following are suggestions on how to emotionally deal with the death of loving parents: 1.Take care of your own emotional needs. Be aware your emotions will be on an emotional roller coaster. 2.Crying and emotionally letting it all out is fine. 3.Do not let anyone but yourself determine how you will grieve and how long it will last. The course of grieving is totally unique with each person. 4.Talk and reminisce with family and friends about your parents. 5.Find ways to remember your parents with memories and physical momentos of theirs. 6.Set up future family get togethers as positive anchor points to remember your parents as a family. 7.Be open to asking for emotional support. No one is a totally self-sufficient island. 8.As you feel appropriate,seek out support groups for grieving to interact with persons experiencing similar grieving experiences. 9.As you feel appropriate,seek out an experienced therapist familiar with parental loss grieving.

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss STOP OVERSHARING INAPPROPRIATE INFORMATION IN SOCIAL INTERACTIONS WHEN FEELING SOCIALLY AWKWARD AND SOCIALLY ANXIOUS

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    January 4, 2022

    Let us begin by eliminating the narcissist who always wants to share information with an often seductive and always deceitful purpose in mind. The oversharing of persons who have social awkwardness and social anxiety has nothing in common with the self-serving communications of the narcissist. In fact,I have often found persons who are socially awkward and socially anxious are very sensitive and caring persons…A common problem for the socially awkward and socially anxious person is to overshare information in an inappropriate manner that makes the other person feel uncomfortable and makes them afterwards upset with themselves about how much information was inappropriately shared. This happens when someone may be anxious when the conversation does not seem to be going anywhere and they feel the need to fill it in with information that may go far beyond what would be appropriate in such a situation. For example, if in the checkout lane at the grocery store and someone asks you how you are and you start talking in detail about all the problems you are having with your spouse. This would not be appropriate. To do this with a co-worker or acquaintance would be worse. Persons do this often without thinking about possible negative consequences in relationships or making other persons uncomfortable when sharing too much about themselves. This information can even be used against them. Some persons also do this too often when trying too fast to move along a relationship and turn the person off. Another reason persons do this who are socially anxious is they worry about how they are being perceived and feel the need to be liked and wrongfully believe this can be best done by giving what they erroneously believe is an authentic presentation of how they are feeling. Being authentic is quite different from sharing information that is not appropriate. If this continues happening to you over and over again even when you start picking up cues they are uncomfortable with all the information you are sharing,this can become a big problem with the quality of your social interactions and even friendships. If this is a problem you are having, and it is more of a common problem than you might think, the following are suggestions on what to do to limit oversharing inappropriate information: 1.Think before you speak. Always have in mind what are appropriate and inappropriate things to say. 2.If in doubt or anxious about where a conversation is going or if there is silence, simply have some questions to continue the discussion rather than rambling on giving too much information. 3.Slow down the pace of the conversation when you are speaking to have more control over what you say. Too often,persons ramble on because of the need they feel to continue the conversation. 4.If using social media, think before you send messages to better determine what is appropriate to say or not say. 5.If you realize you are entering into a conversation that is going the wrong direction, shift the conversation and try to talk about something else. 6.Keep a journal of your conversations and see if there is a pattern to who and what you overshare and when you do it. You can use this information to help you not do it any more or at least begin to make it occur far less frequently. Your journal is a link into yourself to try to analyze and find why you are sharing the information with persons and start better monitoring the information you share at a global level. This will over time hopefully lead to a new communication style with persons. 7.You are far better off to feel awkward in a conversation and not overshare than feel guilty for what you said. 8.Talk to family,friends and persons you trust and ask them when they feel you have overshared information that could be seen as inappropriate and/or negative for you. 9.If you feel the need,seek out a trained therapist who can role-play with you on conversations you have had where you feel you have overshared information and learn techniques to overcome this problem. 

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss OLDER PERSONS(65 AND OLDER) AND DEPRESSION

    Subscribe to our YouTube page!- November 8, 2022

    No one is immune from depression. It impacts everyone to one degree or another in one’s lifetime. The problem with persons 65 and older is that they are often having to deal with issues that younger persons do not. Most specifically, it would include problems with their physical and mental abilities, loss of a spouse, family location,loss of employment, lack of mobility,death of friends, poor memory,loss of status and accepting mortality… Not that all of these things happen to one person at the same time or that they always cause depression. But over time they do tend to occur in some combination with most persons as the cycle of life progresses. The following are important things to do to help alleviate the sadness and depression that can occur in older persons due to the issues mentioned above: 1.Exercise and keep as physically fit as possible. 2.Have regular medical check ups to make sure you are physically as healthy as possible. 3.Seek out counseling as necessary to help you with the changes of life that occur in your aging process that cause you depression. 4.Accept changes that can cause depression will occur and plan accordingly as best you can. 5.Finely hone your spiritual and/or internal resources to help you find purpose in your life from what you have experienced and what you intend to experience in the latter stages of your life. As always,make each day count. 6.Continue to be as involved as you can in church and any other activities. 7.Cultivate and keep in contact with friends you have known over your lifetime. Talk to persons you may not have talked to for decades. 8.Become more communicative with your spouse,family and persons close to you. 9. Resist isolation. Be as active as you can. 10. Do puzzles and any other intellectual activities to keep your mind sharp…Aging is a process we all go through as we live our lives. The important thing is not to have great fear and resulting depression but do whatever you can to find meaning in your life through maximal physical, intellectual and emotional involvement. As you age do not focus on the disabilities or limitations you have but rather focus on what you can do to make as much impact as possible on yourself and others. The road of life can be difficult but it can always be meaningful and something to look forward to. GO FOR IT WITH GUSTO!!!!!!

    Dr Braccio & Mike Austin of 1320 AM discuss SUCCEED BY CONFRONTING THE FEARS OF YOUR WORST CASE SCENARIOS

    August 16, 2022

    The dreams and aspirations of so many people are destroyed by their own worst case scenarios. Common worst case scenarios could include:1.The perceived humiliation of being turned down for a date with a potential life partner. 2.Not applying for the “perfect job” for fear of being rejected. 3.Not moving to your dream location for fear of not succeeding and returning home as an humiliated failure. 4.Not seeking a prized degree or training program for fear of humiliation and ridicule for not completing it. 5.Not standing up for self out of fear of severe retaliation. 6.Staying in a dull and no hope for promotion job out of fear of failing and being fired at another job and the family going on public assistance. 7.Constant fear of living the “imposter phenomenon” where in spite of your ongoing success you will be found out and humiliated as not up to your job and fired or demoted…The examples can go on and on. The remedy is to focus on the prize and accept possible roadblocks as you voyage forth to fulfill your goals and dreams. When life is coming to a close,people do not lament they tried and often did put their dreams into reality. No,they lament unfulfilled dreams because of their worst case scenarios. 

    Dr Braccio & Rich Herl of 1320 AM discuss WE NEED POSITIVE SELF-EFFICACY TO FULFILL OUR DREAMS

    July 26, 2022

    Positive self-efficacy is the belief one has the capacity to complete activities in effective ways. A person with positive self-efficacy encounters a problem, looks at the factors that need to be resolved and attempts to complete them. Even though the person may fail, they will more realistically analyze why they failed rather than the person with negative self-efficacy who will be convinced not only that they did not have the ability to complete it but never would have the ability. Positive self-esteem is a positive view of self while positive self-efficacy is the belief one can successfully complete an activity. The person with positive self-efficacy does not see problems in the current life-space as something to be fearful of or to try to run away from,but rather as opportunities for resolution and challenges that can make life more interesting. The person with positive self-efficacy works relentlessly to be the quarterback while the person with negative self-efficacy,regardless of ability,prefers to sit in a chair and watch the quarterback play rather than risk certain perceived failure if they attempted to become the quarterback.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM WILS discuss POSITIVE MEMORIES REDUCE DEPRESSION

    July 5, 2022

    POSITIVE MEMORIES REDUCE DEPRESSION Psychologists have known for some time that positive thoughts and memories produce positive persons. The ability to remember and focus on positive thoughts in one’s life accurately and intuitively point out the obvious: Positive thoughts and memories reduce depression. If a person focuses on negative memories, the present is going to be depressing and the future will look the same because the future will be filled with the current present negative memories and so it goes on and on in a never ending cycle. One must cognitively restructure or consciously replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts in order to have a chance for positive self-esteem and a life free or with far less depression than the person who focuses on negative thoughts. This brings me to the fact that after nearly 400 segments with you Dave, this is the last PSYCHOLOGICALLY SPEAKING segment we will do together on WILS 1320 AM radio. It has been a great ride and it is hard to believe how quickly the past 7 1/2 years have gone. The memories from the segments will always be positive as I have greatly enjoyed doing them with you and the hope is they have been enjoyable for you and helpful for our listeners. I simply want to give a shout out THANK YOU and HOORAY to you for your superb professionalism and wish you the best in your continuing successes. We will continue the nearly 30 year long-term relationship we have had since your days as the Sports Director and News Anchor at WLNS-TV 6. Our interactions are a significant part of my positive long term memories that will keep coming back as emotional nourishment to keep depression on the ropes!

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly discuss CARING FOR FAMILY CAREGIVERS

    June 21, 2022

    We live in an age where millions of spouses,children and siblings look after beloved members of their families. In 2020,53 million Americans were offering unpaid care for adults with health or functional needs. This was an increase of 9.5 million from 2015. The most common caregiver is one spouse looking after the other. Another very common combination is a child or children looking after a parent. Too often, these caregivers are taken for granted and other family persons or caring non-family are not aware or minimize the problems they are experiencing or choose in some cases to ignore. The odds are quite high we have a family caregiver in this situation or know of one. The common issues caregivers have would include problems with managing time, physical and emotional distress, depression and isolation, financial concerns, sleep deprivation, guilt and fear of asking for support. Things that other family members, dear friends and caring persons can offer include the following: 1.Help with every day chores and needs. 2.Emotional/psychological support. 3.Help with healthcare needs. 4.As desired,give good advice. 5.Try to help them recognize their emotional and physical health are also priorities. 6.Make sure you do not use guilt in your support. 7.If asked,seek out support persons or agencies that can be of support. 8.Availability.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly Discuss THE MACHIAVELLIAN MANIPULATOR IS VERY HARD TO IDENTIFY

    June 28, 2022

    Unlike the narcissist, common bully and sociopath who are relatively quickly found out to be who they are,the situation is very different with the Machiavellian Manipulator who skillfully pretends to fairly live within agreed upon social rules and norms. They often very cleverly work within the system to achieve maximum success for themselves regardless of the negative consequences for others. Because they deceitfully but effectively use all the correct words and techniques to advance,they are particularly hard to identify and often by the time they are identified their evil deeds have succeeded at your expense. Even after it happens,others may not be aware of what has happened and will continue to be part of their evil designs. The best way to determine if you are interacting with a Machiavellian Manipulator is to observe,listen to comments of others,discretely talk to others and observe outcomes from interactions they have with others. If you ever encountered one, you certainly are aware of how difficult they are to identify because they are seemingly working and interacting with others with the same agreed upon norms everybody is working under. A concise definition of manipulation is using inappropriate psychological techniques with other persons to control their thoughts and actions. It can happen in any setting. It is most common in close relationships such as family,spouses,friendships and work settings. Typical manipulation techniques would include using the following: Guilt. Blame. Complaints. Playing innocent or ignorant. Gaslighting. Lying. Bullying. Mind games. Insecurities/Weak spots,Mockery. Judging. When these techniques are skillfully camouflaged by the Machiavellian Manipulator,victims can be amazed and shocked when they learn what has or is negatively happening to them. If one is in such a relationship with a Machiavellian Manipulator,it is important to seek out supportive friends, colleagues and professional support to minimize the damage done to you socially,psychologically,personally and/or professionally.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss BE A HAPPY INTROVERT

    June 14, 2022

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    It is pretty well known that in Western Society the extrovert(EXTERNALLY DIRECTED)is praised and often seen as the ideal. This can needlessly lead to the introvert(INTERNALLY DIRECTED)developing low self-esteem and seeing self as less than the extrovert. Because extroverts and introverts clearly seem to be wired differently, it becomes important for each person to accept who they are and nurture their particular characteristics. The following are typical characteristics introverts have which need to be cherished,nurtured and enjoyed as opposed to being seen as negative: 1.Need for less social interaction. 2.Greater interpersonal intimacy. 3.Enjoyment of being alone. 4.Strong emphasis on self-development. 5.Enjoyment of solitary activities. 6.Desire for meaningful conversation. 7.Greater social distance for internal peace. 8.Purposeful life with a sense of simplicity. 9.Strong sense of independence…The fact many introverts are quite satisfied with themselves is something to keep in mind if you are an introvert or someone you love and care for is and has low self-esteem because of it.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss THE REALITY OF PROLONGED GRIEF DISORDER

    June 19, 2022

    The killing of 19 children and two teachers in Uvalde,Texas and other senseless killings along with the million deaths resulting from COVID clearly has Americans tuned in to the grieving that individuals have who have lost children, friends, family members and even acquaintances. There has also been a public grieving where millions of Americans have joined with family and friends in the grieving process. Our grieving will end over time. That does not always happen for family and close friends of persons who for whatever the reason have lost loved ones. To be killed by a psychopath predictably would lead to the most intense grieving possible. Yet the length of time a person grieves totally depends on the person. It has often been said wrongly that grieving that lasts more than a year is a psychological problem. That is absurd and even very insensitive to the grieving person. Personally,I can state my parents never fully got over the death of my 2 year old brother in 1943 from childhood meningitis. Fortunately, DSM V has just recently added the diagnosis of Prolonged Grief Disorder. There are many persons who can need years and even a lifetime to overcome grieving for a loved one. Symptoms would include such characteristics as the following: 1.Disbelief it could have happened. 2.Intense longing for the person. 3.Identity confusion where the person feels not whole without the deceased person. 4.Avoiding reminders of the deceased. 5.Emotional numbness. 6.Intense loneliness. 7.Feeling life is meaningless. 8.No desire to meaningfully interact with people or with life. 9.Intense despair…The intensity of these feelings do not subside but can stay in force for years. The person with Prolonged Grief Disorder needs sensitivity and patience from friends and family. Additionally,clergy and trained therapists with grieving expertise can be helpful as deemed appropriate by the person.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss GRUDGES ARE BAD FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 AM discuss GRUDGES ARE BAD FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH March 2, 2021 A grudge is maintaining anger, resentment, hurt, sadness, and/or bitterness if someone is believed to have wronged you. This can range from something as small as a perceived negative look to a major betrayal. Most persons, even if they do not admit it or feel their grudge is legitimate and not a grudge, have them at one time or another in their lives. In fact, many persons live most of their lives with them. When they become time-consuming in your thinking and cause you to have a lot of pathological anger, there is clearly a need to examine yourself and find a way to eliminate them. Anger is often a major component of a grudge. Anger is far more destructive to the person with it than the person that is the object of it. Holding a grudge is like hitting yourself with a hammer to show your anger at someone. Obviously, the person being injured is the person with the hammer and not the object of it. Forgiving and letting go of a grudge is not forgetting or overlooking a wrong that has occurred, and maybe the person has not apologized for it, it is rather a way to get on with your life. You cannot let grudges overwhelm you and allow them to negatively impact on you and your relationships. It frees you to live a life without anger and bitterness from grudges which are replaced with peace and an open heart to interact with others. You choose not to ruin the present which of course can lead to ongoing damage in the future.

    THE EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL PAIN OF SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly of 1320 discuss THE EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL PAIN OF SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER 2-23-21

    Anxiety is a common human trait that can actually be helpful in our lives as we encounter the normal stresses of life. When meeting new people, giving presentations or interacting with others causes us to become anxious to the point we cannot function in our own lives, this is when we have Social Anxiety Disorder . With this condition, we are filled with fear, embarrassment, anxiety produced physical symptoms and self-consciousness so we become fearful of being negatively judged by others. An estimated 7.1% of persons in the United States have had Social Anxiety Disorder the past year. For adults, females have a frequency of 8% and men 6.1%. For anyone who has had it or suffered from it, the emotional and even physical pain that result can be debilitating. About one in eight persons have had Social Anxiety Disorder at one time or another. It is the third most common mental disorder in the United States. More than 75% of persons who suffer from it first experience the symptoms when children or early childhood. The following are the key elements that professional treatment entails: 1.Educational awareness of the social anxiety sources and symptoms. 2.Counseling, particularly Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. 3.Medication as deemed  appropriate. Particularly effective have been the SSRIs. These would include Zoloft, Celexa, Prozac, Lexapro and Paxil.

    Dr Braccio & Dave Akerly Discuss on 1320 AM to TREAT EVERYDAY AS VALENTINE’S DAY AND SIGNIFICANTLY IMPROVE THE EMOTIONAL AND SEXUAL COMPONENTS OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

     2-16-2021- Valentine’s Day is a special time of the year when couples share their love for each other with loving cards, comments and gifts of such things as chocolates and flowers. Solid relationships clearly are stronger when each member of the couple is aware there is gratitude, love, caring and a general awareness of the importance of the relationship. When this occurs,then the natural outcome is enhanced emotional and sexual compatibility that  only gains strength as the couple develops deeper and more meaningful love over the years. Celebrating such events as anniversaries, birthdays,special days in your relationship and any other potential time to celebrate together the importance of your love for each other and the relationship will only enhance it. Too often people live in what becomes a boring routine relationship and true gratitude and love can become dimmed and the result is a loss of emotional and sexual satisfaction  which can lead to withering and even an ending of the relationship. It is important to not allow this to happen and that each person in a relationship never forget why they are together.  They are building a life together that can include children, a home, fun and work activities together. While these are all important aspects of a successful relationship, the showing of gratitude and acts of love will ensure loving times together on an ongoing basis. These are essential to have a positive emotional and sexual long-term relationship. That is why I am suggesting each day be treated as Valentine’s Day. You will see the results will be a greatly enhanced relationship based on strong and mutual emotional and sexual compatibility and desire.