September 3, 2024-
Even though most people would admit apologies are important, it also is true they often have
problems effectively giving them. Part of the problem is that people can feel like failures and
believe they will be looked upon in a negative way if they admit they have done something
inappropriate. Pride,ego and narcissism can also interfere to the point they deny they have done
anything wrong and play the victim by strongly claiming victimhood when they clearly had the
choice not to offend the person. This is very common. Defensiveness can also result in not
wanting to admit wrongdoing. Others blame third persons for their bad behavior which negates
their own responsibility. My advice is to simply look at the facts and see if what occurred was
inappropriate on your part and if there is a way you could have stopped it from occurring. If the
answer is yes to both of these, then an apology certainly seems like an appropriate thing to
do.The following are the elements of an effective apology: 1.Acknowledgment to yourself you
did wrong. 2.Accept you purposefully or inadvertently offended another person. 3.Clearly define
it exactly for what it is. 4.Say you are sorry for what you did to the person in unequivocal words
and a promise to not do it again. 5.Accept the offended person may not readily accept your
apology and may even react with angry or hurt feelings.